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ughuhgufh you know that feeling where you want someone SO BAD like not even in a sexual way like you just want to touch their skin and hug them and feel their warmth and smell their scent and feel how soft their hair is and look into their eyes and hear their voice and soak in their presence like it’s physically impossible to have them by your side but you need it so bad like you just want them to be yours you want them physically there for you
If I can’t have the boy, at least I can have his clothes.
They leave their sweaters, their jackets, their blue jeans draped
over my bed like petals, filling the bathtub, rising to the surface
of the water like buoys. My therapist once pontificated
that loving someone who is already with another
is misplaced energy. She placed an apricot in my hand
and made me roll it between my palms,
its soft downy skin like velvet across my fingers.
The Ancient Greeks believed that apricot pits
were all the words a dead person meant to say but didn’t,
hardened into a dense stone
hidden deep within that pale orange flesh.
Today, though, desire renders me speechless.
There’s nothing more to say that hasn’t already been said.
When they leave, the boys never exit the normal way:
they have to jump out the window, slide down the roof,
pick the lock on the back door with an extra
bobby pin. Love makes people do strange things.
And the day I held that apricot, I learned
that there’s no room for small talk.
If you love someone, let them know.
Even ghosts have things they wish they’d said.
*tips fedora at hazel grace* m’taphor
I want a movie about a guy who runs for president and wins but then suddenly realizes that he doesn’t want to be president, so he just starts doing ridiculous things all the time trying to get impeached, but it NEVER WORKS because they always miraculously end up being the right thing to do. Like, he declares war on Canada? Next day it turns out that Canada had secret plans to nuke Washington. he bans Doritos? Turns out theyr’e the number one cause of cancer and natural disasters. He sends his vice president to jail? Turns out the VP was a terrorist in disguise. He has 100% approval rating, most popular president ever.
I’ve decided that I want him to be played by Jeff Goldblum.
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